Riza Fortuna

Getting into a relationship is easy. But having a good one and making it work and much more last, is the hard part. There are three essential things that I learned that makes a relationship work, namely, being Truthful, Trusting, and Thankful.

A relationship must be built on Truth. If two people do not know each other as each one truly is, it is impossible to have true acceptance and much more real loving. Well, it is also impossible to fully know a person even in a lifetime. However, as long as each is true to the other and always honest with one’s facts, thoughts and feelings among others, then there’s a good chance the relationship will last should both parties decide they want it to. Personally, I value honesty so much that I admire a person who admits even his or her ugliest portion in the light of being truthful and not wanting to pretend or hide anything.

The hard lesson I learned is to be Trusting. I ask a lot of questions and that is natural to me. However in the process I tend to have lack of trust or is perceived not to trust. A friend confronted me about this issue and I decided to give my whole-hearted trust. I also learned that I should express my curious nature in a way that is not misunderstood as lack of trust. Quite complicated but coupled with a lot of compassion for the other person I learned that it can be worked on. I discovered that trusting is one of the best deposits to the emotional bank account to the other party and it always begets trust too whether quickly or slowly. Especially for a man, to love him is to trust him.

Lastly, and the most easy and natural for me is to be Thankful. A relationship, new or running for years need a lot of appreciation. A person needs a lot of everyday affirmation. We women need more affirmation and assurance more than men. But regardless of the gender of the other party, giving frequent doses of appreciation is always welcome and helps a relationship be filled with warmth and smile. Relationships after all are source of inspiration and encouragement, of growth to both parties. Expressing gratefulness, appreciation, or admiration is then essential to make a relationship life-giving. If done spontaneously, then there is more chance both parties grow more to become who they are meant to become and the relationship will consequently stand the test of time should both parties decide to keep it.

I hope that by capturing my learning’s in writing I apply my lessons to the relationships I choose to keep and prepare me for the hard work of keeping lifelong ones. I resolve to work hard to be Truthful, Trusting, and Thankful with the other parties in my relationships. I wish all my friends and those who read this that they too enjoy their relationships and make them work and last!