Riza Fortuna

There is nothing like having siblings. I have three blood siblings – two brothers and one sister. It is amazing how a blessing it is to have such a community at home. We are brothers and sisters, great friends and allies, sometimes foes, a strong network, support, and a lot more to each other. I love my brothers and sisters and see them as one of the best blessings God has given me in this life.

This sharing however is about having met brothers and sisters in faith, fellow Christians. In particular, I unexpectedly met in the course of doing my job, a brother from India and a sister from South Africa.

Last July, I was running a company week-long training for Asia in Singapore. It was meant for site leaders in our field. However, there were two special participants – one from a service provider company (that means he is not an employee of our company) and one from outside Asia. They are my brother and sister in Christ from India and Johannesburg, South Africa respectively. I did not expect they are Christians and that we can share about our faith until the three of us went to lunch together.

That was not a usual lunch. I usually went with the fellow Filipinos in the group but that noon I was led to ask who wants to go lunch with me and it happened the three of us went together. Over a simple Burger King lunch, we were led to open about our activities outside work and found out that each of us are active members of our respective Christian groups or churches. The Indian guy is a pastor in his church, the young South African lady is an active charismatic member of her church. The lunch turned out to be a sharing of our faith in a common God and a revelation of the souls that we are.

It is more than two months since we met. But I am reminded of God’s faithfulness when our Indian brother wrote me and our South African sister a few days ago to ask our prayers for the persecuted Christians in India. You may have heard of the church burning and severe persecution the Christian churches in India are experiencing. My heart goes to them and I promised to pray for them constantly which I am now doing daily. Although his email was filled with terrifying stories of persecution I cannot but praise God for the relationship that has been established among the three of us, brother and sisters in Christ. I am amazed that unexpectedly I can meet such beautiful souls. More amazed that we come from different backgrounds and generations. We are of different races, cultures, and ages. Yet the differences don’t matter. We are so much connected even if we don’t even know when we can meet in person again. We are one in Christ.

I pray that God bless my brother and sister. But most especially that our friendship can help each other to fulfill each of our Christian calling. May God be glorified wherever each of us is, in whatever stage of life we are.

Praise be Jesus Christ our Lord who unifies, the God of all nations!

I have not blogged for a long time and I feel guilty. Surely it is OK not to. However, writing down my thoughts and especially reflection on personal events is part of fulfilling my personal calling. Being born to share and teach I feel I am being selfish when I don’t take time to sit down, write, and share.

Tonight I felt some emptiness. I did have a full day with so many things done, but I still had space to be empty. It then reminded me that I need to give. From where I am, away from my personal circles, the way to do that is to write. So here I am.

I realized that life without giving is meaningless. While giving can be in the form of material, it is certainly not the only means and may not even be the best one. All depends on what one is called to do by one’s Creator.

The past several months have been very colorful for me. Most colors represent challenges, trials, and struggles. Life has not been easy, but certainly God’s grace has been sufficient. I am mostly adjusted to being away from my home country, but the remaining adjustment to do is the hardest and requires a lot of faith, strength, and perseverance.

Of equal weight are the pressures I face at work whether real or perceived and starting local friendships from where I am. I certainly love my job and this is the greatest opportunity I ever have been blessed in my career. However, I am still adjusting and can get stressed many times. I realize though that most of it is still within my personal control and I can therefore adjust my approach. As for my personal life, I still have to build a regular support system. Up to now I am still relying mostly on my support systems back in Philippines which certainly keep me going but I realize I have to develop local support too. I have a few friends here now but still need some more network as fits who I am, one who is comfortable having lots of friends.

I have a lot more realizations or events to ponder on and will put them more in succeeding blogs. I am looking forward to write not only because I feel guilty not to but also because I have never lost the passion to share my life. I thank God for the gift of “guilt” though, it is a good prompt or reminder to go in the path that we should and do what we ought to. (Sept.20,2008)

Everyone may have heard of the recent disastrous earthquake in Sichuan province in China. My line of work is in the field of Health, Safety, and Environment which includes ensuring the safety of our people across Asia. We have a manufacturing plant in Chengdu, the capital of Sichuan province. For successive days after the earthquake, I was on phone talking with the site safety manager and reviewing the status of our plant and people and giving them recommendations on how to ensure the safety of the site and its people post-earthquake.

After 3 days of doing phone reviews with our Chengdu Plant, I felt in my heart that the right thing to do is to fly and visit the site myself. Nobody asked me to do it but I can sense the distress in the site people and that their biggest need for the moment is assurance. They need to be assured that their plant is safe, or can be prepared to be safe to resume operations, but more than anything else, they want assurance that they can overcome the trauma of this whole tragic experience. There may be nobody hurt in our site during the earthquake but the emotions and psychological state of the people are greatly affected as they see their surroundings and know of the thousands of deaths in their province.

The leading was confirmed during my prayer time last Friday morning where I came across the verse “Faith without works is dead” (James 2:16). Frankly, I was scared to go to Sichuan. There are a bunch of risks which include the aftershocks which to-date is now over 5000 in occurrence. However, I felt deep in my heart that the right thing to do is to go and visit the site myself. I cannot continue just doing phone reviews when I can fly and be there. Much more, I wanted to encourage our site people especially the safety team who have been working extraordinarily to help ensure the safety of everyone. So I was there last Sunday to Tuesday. God’s grace was enough to exercise my faith that allowed me to respond to the call of the moment.

When I was there, I did on-site inspection of our facility and the on-going repair work. True I was able to contribute technically, but what made me so glad to be there was to see the spirits of the people lifted up because they feel supported whenever they see external people like us coming over. I also discovered that my main contact, the site safety manager, had difficulty finding a new house to stay since her apartment building had some damage. I saw her distress and my heart goes to her since she was ensuring the safety of everyone else, but she herself was in want of shelter. Even when she told me not to worry I contacted some colleagues in our work network and asked them to help her find a new apartment. Soon enough, the outpouring of support came. The company itself through HR has been providing generous support to our employees along with generous donation to the disaster relief operations. My contact eventually found a temporary shelter. The colleagues I contacted may not have been able to provide direct support to find a new apartment for her, but their gesture did provide moral support to our Chengdu colleague.

On Tuesday, the day I was to fly back to Guangzhou where I am based, I got an early text message from my contact that the government advised the public there may be an aftershock of 6-7 scale during the day or the next day. I was advised to immediately go back to Guangzhou. My flight that day was at 2pm and I was in dilemma that early morning whether I will leave Chengdu right away or stick to my flight schedule. I was led to ask for prayers from sisters and brother in my Christian community, and to continue with my usual morning prayer first before doing any move. I was asking for God’s direction for the day and the verse “Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved (Psalm 55:22, RSV)” struck me strongly. Such verse told me to just stay put, lift up my situation to God, and trust that I shall never be harmed for God intended to protect me and keep me safe. So I decided to stick with my scheduled flight, went on with my day where I had a two-hour conference call in the morning which I led, and then went to the airport at noon. When I arrived at the airport it was a mess. It was thickly filled with people who were mostly tense. Maybe many of them are seeking a safe shelter in other China cities. Amidst the chaos, I was praising God that there is no major aftershock and I am safe while in Chengdu. I claimed he answered the prayers that my community brother and sisters prayed with me:
“That if God wants, he will not allow the major aftershock to occur and that he have mercy on the Sichuan people and keep us all safe”. My flight was delayed for three hours where two of those hours I spent inside the plane which took long to take off for undisclosed reason. When finally I arrived in Guangzhou safe and sound I was just so grateful for God’s faithfulness. Looking back the previous days when I decided to go to Chengdu, I already had the assurance deep within that all will be well because God is with me all the way. Praise be to God who never fails to look after and hear His people! (Riza Fortuna, May 22,2008)

I love bodies of water. Last Saturday, our family had our summer outing in a beach and I had a great relaxing time.

It has been a long time since I just "got lost" in the midst of the sea. I can barely remember when was the last time I was on the beach. Last Saturday was a real treat especially for my exhausted body and spirit.

I have been "on the run" the past couple of months. Aside from traveling for work, I was also coping with the demands of my new life in China. I did not realize I was already almost "out of gas".

This vacation time in the Philippines is a much needed break for me. If I were a vehicle or machine, this is my "refueling and maintenance" time. I am just glad to be home at this point. The outing at the beach was one of the highlights. There I was able to truly recharge.

I enjoyed the moment in the middle of the sea. I like the feel of the sea water, and more so I love the feeling of just "getting lost" for a while. I savored the moment thinking nothing, doing nothing (except of course to make sure I stay afloat).

The weather was nicely sunny, the water was peaceful even with a few waves, and the scenery was refreshing. It was perfect for a time to be still, a time to savor the water, to feel the sun, see the greens and blue skies. It was also a time just to thank God.

I realize however that I am called to be still not only during that day in the beach. In general, I am called to be still at this point in my life. Being still means to just let go and let God do His wonderful work in my life. I am such an action person, but this time, I just have to relax and enjoy.

As I go back to work in a couple of days, I want to continue to savor the nice feeling of water around me. I want to wear a relaxed spirit despite coping with multiple demands and great challenges of my job. I want to continue to enjoy even when the environment may present lots of stresses. This sounds ironic and hardly possible. But I trust the Holy Spirit to be with me all the way.

Tomorrow, I will do my most important refueling - I will spend a date with God in a personal day of prayer in Tagaytay. This time, I will not be in the sea but will climb the hill to listen to God; to be still and savor His presence. I look forward to a relaxing date with the Lord.

I left Manila last January 4 to go back to my new "home base", Guangzhou, China. The past one and a half months saw me starting up my new home, adjusting to living all by myself, experiencing winter (and the coldest at that in China), and becoming domesticated which was never my cup of tea.

It is natural to expect that it can get boring to be living alone. However I have not come to the point of being bored so far. There is just so much to do, so much to explore. Surprisingly, I enjoy doing the mundane daily stuff including the household chores. Well, probably mostly because I did not get to do much of them in the Philippines. I would even say I have now mastered doing house work except cooking. Though the kitchen has become one of my favorite spots in the house, there is so much I can still do in terms of cooking and food preparation beyond the frying and preparing ready to serve dishes.

Doing house work also made me realize one thing: that I am such an achiever. As long as I have goals, there is always something to look forward to. For example, I set the goal to arrange my kitchen and complete the unpacking of my brand new kitchen and dining ware. It took me almost the entire day to do it, but it gave me much sense of accomplishment. There is one watch out with me though, once I have started doing something and like what I am doing, I can get engrossed and forget about time. Even at home I can be a workaholic that I have to schedule my leisure time and ‘force’ myself to just chill out.

Leisure time is largely watching DVD’s. It’s one of my favorite ‘passive focus’ activities that make me forget about my concerns and just rest. Shopping (or window shopping) is another favorite stuff. However, with the cold winter, I avoid going out as much as possible. So other leisure activities that entail going out would have to be mostly done beyond winter.

I also had a milestone at home - I received my first set of vacationing visitors consisting of my friends from Cebu: my kindergarten best friend and a sister from Children of Mary-Mandaue City whom I have not met in years. Such a grand time at home, around Guangzhou, and in Hongkong. Those were the days that I have to go out of the home and brave the winter. Their visit was my ‘pilot’ in entertaining guests; it means I can do so many more but my guests just have to schedule with me ahead of time as I do travel a lot myself.

While I am away from my family, it is easy to communicate especially with the help of internet. Too expensive if one makes traditional phone calls, so I get creative in using other options.

There are some setbacks in adjusting to a life alone in another country. But having Filipino friends and neighbors help a great deal. My pinoy friends come from the same company where I work and I chose to live close them where I can keep in touch with their families conveniently.

As I reflect, what makes everything work is the presence of Someone with me ALL the time. God has been my companion, friend, and family that make my home never lonely despite having only one tangible physical body. I thank the Lord for always having His hand upon me and making His presence always felt.

A year ago, I would have never guessed the surprises I’ve been through in 2007. The year that was has been one of the most colorful years in my life. Well-spiced in all aspects, I am amazed to realize I have been through so much and survived well all by God’s grace.

First, there was the reality of death presented to my face. At the start of the year, one of my closest sisters in community had cancer and had her operation last January. After months of praying and battling cancer, she survived and is back to good shape now. Then my closest mentor at work died by end-January, and I was grieving for at least a month. Then my first guardian in

Manila

, great grandma Lola Terang who took care of me for several years since I relocated from

Cebu

died last March.

The year went on to present me major personal tests and trials all involving relationships. During the first quarter, I almost got into a relationship that would have rocked my Christian faith big time. After several years, my heart became open to love again. However, the prospective guy whom I am attracted strongly to do not fit into the kind of life I am called to live - a life that helps build Christian communities. Had I said yes to the guy, my life would have been radically changed now. However, I realize it is God’s will and my relationship with Him that matters more than anything else.

Then there were other tests involving significant persons in my life. While I did struggle, by God’s constant and sufficient grace I went through them confident and assured of God’s hand protecting and preserving such important relationships. Now, there is real peace and joy, and my heart is grateful to God’s faithfulness in this area.

The biggest change in my life also happened this year. While I never thought I will live outside the country at this point in my life, I did move to

China

recently. If not for God’s power to change my heart, I would have never made such decision. Now I am grateful for this major personal change. While it is not easy to adjust to a new environment which is truly out of my comfort zone, I am confident that this is a time to grow and a period of many graces.

Work-wise, I cried in a meeting (and global at that) for the first time when I was in the

US

last July. That only symbolized a major challenge I was undergoing at work which I survived with much support from management and colleagues. The "suffering" was all worth it since in the end it delivered a breakthrough change in our company globally. Again, that was a milestone of growth in my life. I was also promoted to a key position, one that fits me for who I am and is very challenging to do.

This year, I also celebrated 30, 15, and 10 years of friendship with my kindergarten best friend, male best friend, and first close sister friend in Lingkod ng Panginoon community respectively. Distance and life changes did not affect my relationship with each of them; rather, the bond gets stronger as time passes by.

I also "stepped down" from my service as regional women’s leader in Lingkod ng Panginoon Metro Manila which marks fully moving on to Ligaya ng Panginoon, my current Christian community which is the mother community of Lingkod. Little did I know that such moving beyond Lingkod is part of my preparation for my move out of the country. Otherwise, I should still be in

Philippines

continuing my service.

One of my greatest blessings this year is my Women’s Group in Ligaya ng Panginoon, my main support system. My pastoral leader Weng has been such a great blessing whose love, understanding, and selflessness helped me a lot. My group mates have been my prayer warriors and encourager together with long-time Lingkod friends whose friendship I consider a great privilege.

The year ended with a bang, this time the highlight is in the family. My youngest sibling and only sister Rowela got married this month. Since I only recently moved to

China

, going home in time for the wedding was a journey of faith. But I did claim that God will put all things in order and allow me to complete my immigration requirements in time to go home before my sister’s wedding. I received my passport stamped with my residence permit in

China

the day before I flew back to

Manila

two nights before the wedding. Aside from a blessed event since the wedding was very beautiful and excellently organized with the help of Lingkod Cavite brothers & sisters, it was also a time for a grand family reunion for several days as my paternal grandmother and siblings were all with us together with more relatives.

Most of all, the year ends with so much joy and peace as I was able to have my annual date with God in a personal retreat in Tagaytay on Dec.30-31. It was a very nice time to savor the year of blessings that has been, and to simply rest in God’s arms. I realize that life may not be perfect and not as we wanted and planned, but when lived with God’s love, we are assured of a fulfilled life in this temporal dwelling.

Dear Lord, thanks for everything that has been in 2007! Thanks for allowing the spices and colors, and most of all for providing sufficient grace each time that allowed me to breeze through the past year. Thanks especially for the angels you have sent me including in

China

now! All praise and glory be to you o Lord!

It has been quite a while since I am able to sit down and write on my blogs. I was much into a series of activities that allow me to realize my biggest decision and calling for the present - to relocate to China.

Although I am currently in the Philippines mainly for my sister’s wedding this month as well as for the holidays, I am no longer based in my home country. Instead, effective this month, I am already based in Guangzhou, China.

If you ask me two years ago or more, I can never imagine moving into China or simply moving out of the Philippines and live abroad. I have been travelling frequently over the last decade due to work, but those are short trips. Residing abroad was not a compelling dream. However, something happened that changed my heart within the past year.

Whenever I go to other countries, I make it a point to attend Sunday mass whenever I spend weekends there. In the process of doing so, my heart has always been touched seeing Christians from different races and cultures attending mass in those foreign churches. I always end up praying for the growth of those churches I visited. Eventually, I developed the desire to contribute in any way to such growth.

When our company announced the relocation of regional hubs to fastest growing markets like China and India, I felt it was time to seriously consider going out of the country. I have been working for a regional role the past seven years and always managed to be based in the Philippines. However, this time, both career and personal calling seem to point to me going out of the country. So last March and April this year I finally "sat down" and did a formal discernment with the help of my leaders in my Christian community. I sought God’s will regarding going out of the  Philippines and relocating abroad.

God was so clear. At the end of my discernment last Holy Week on April; I knew for certain it is my calling to go to China. (If you are interested on the details of this, I can share separately through my personal email.) When June came, I got the formal offer to move to China from my boss who never knew the discernment I went through nor the fact that I have some interest to get relocated. She was so surprised when I instantly said yes to the offer. What she did not know was I said yes primarily because I knew it is God’s will for me to move to China. I just told my boss it is high time for me to go out of my comfort zone and grow as a person and in my career (which are of course true). Come to think of it, all pieces fell into place; all aspects of my life support this move. It reminds me of the book "The Alchemist" where it says that "all forces in the universe conspire to have you realize your purpose" (not the verbatim statement but this is the message).

As of now, I am still much into "settling down" in China. While home in Philippines this holiday season, I am actually into the thick of packing and shipping my personal stuff to my new home in Guangzhou. I still do not know the major next steps in terms of fulfilling the main purpose of this relocation. What is clear to me now is that God is telling me "to know and embrace the Chinese culture". Thus, part of integrating myself is to learn the language; so I will study Mandarin in 2008. I am also just starting to establish new relationships in my new location.

I am taking advantage of this time in Philippines to get away this year-end and spend the last two days of the year in Tagaytay to go on personal retreat. I want to discern God’s will for me in 2008 especially as I start a new life embracing the biggest change I have embarked so far. As I move into this new phase, I hope to be able to sit down from time to time and share my adventure with you.

If I can make a request, it is that you include me in your prayers and help ask God that I be given so much grace to fulfill my mission in this relocation; and that in everything God be glorified and magnified.

There is a hole in each of our hearts that can only be filled by God. I believe it is part of God’s design. How do we sense this hole? We feel empty. Even when there is so much going on in our lives, there is something lacking. A sense of emptiness haunts us. In my experience, the hole was filled when I entered into a personal relationship with God.

However, as time goes by, there are moments when another bout of emptiness occurs. Sometimes it is what we call spiritual dryness where we don’t feel the presence of God and thus we feel there’s a lack of something essential.

As I try to think about it, I am led to believe that the hole in our heart "increases" as our capacity to love God grows. As we grow in our relationship with God and continue our Christian journey, we also grow in our need for Him. Thus, we need to get a "greater" filling of God so we can meet the demand of that ever-growing hole.

How do we get a greater filling of God? We can spend more time in prayer, scripture study or reflection, visit God in the Blessed Sacrament, receive more frequently the sacraments especially the Eucharist, read spiritual books that help us grow in faith, or listen to enriching talks. These are but a few examples. The key is to do our part which is to feed more our soul, to keep up with our growth as Christians.

Do we despair when we feel empty or sense an increasing hole in our heart? We should not. Instead, we take it as a positive sign that we are growing in our relationship with God and have not been left stagnant in our faith.

I came across this saying by Fr. Pio and I quote:

"In the spiritual life he who does not advance goes backward. It happens as with a boat which always must go ahead. If it stands still the wind blows it back. Fix the time, the length of your meditation, and do not rise from your place until you have finished even at the cost of being crucified." (Padre Pio)

I met with two young engineers I recently hired to vacant roles in our China organization. Talking with them and being able to confirm that we made the right decision to hire them has been a great source of joy to me this past week. I only read their resumes and interviewed on phone prior to this meeting and so talking with them face to face has been a critical indicator to me.

I have been so pleased to see the passion, talent, and good hearts of these two new people. I am amazed on the fact that given there are two of them with so much different personalities, they have been placed into jobs that I believe are respectively fitting each of them most. Given I didn’t see them in person and I decided to put them into their respective roles which call for different profiles and skills, I feel so blessed that all fell into place.

This part of my job is very fulfilling. Maybe because I have been born a builder. I love to build people and teams. Doing anything that help another person or a group discover their talents, bring out the best in them, and accomplish something significant with them is truly a source of pleasure. I just see myself being so much into it and very passionate about teaching, coaching, and helping others become their best.

I praise and thank God for giving me a job, or better yet, a vocation that allows me to make use of my natural gifts and give me the chance to just truly be myself. Truly great to be paid for something that keeps the passion in me alive and allow me to make a difference! I give back the glory and honor to God, and I offer all of these work to Him.

When I was in the US last month, I got sick and was on the verge of being dehydrated. It was also very hot as summer was in full swing. So, I was drinking fluids as often as I can.

My  hotel has a rack of food and drinks near the front desk which one can pick up and either pay in cash or charge to one’s room. I got drinks several times and have those all charged to my room. However, upon reviewing my statement of account (for express checkout), I found that the latest drinks I got - a Gatorade and bottled water have not been charged. I called the front desk and asked for a new statement of account to include the missed charges.

The reply of the front desk person was "Wow, this is very refreshing! You don’t know what some people do in this hotel. I truly appreciate your honesty and for that the bill is on me; you don’t need to pay for those. And tell your mom that she did a very good job in raising you up!"

Ahh, I was refreshed by those drinks. But it turned out an incident related to them would refresh a hotel person. I was refreshed to hear her comment too. I left the hotel smiling not because I had free drinks but because I feel blessed that indeed my parents raised me well and I have been given the grace to be honest even in little things that can easily be overlooked.